Engaged couples who are ready to tie to knot find it exciting to talk about their wedding plans all the time. Seating arrangements, list of invitees, honeymoon destination, how many kids they would want to have, etc. However, amidst all these topics, money matters seem to take a backseat. If a study encompassed 4500 married couples in the year 2012 is to go by, fights regarding money matters have mostly led to a divorce.
In-laws, household duties, kids, and other factors do not play a key role in finance. Couples who are more or less on the same page financially tend to have good times in the latter years of their marriage. So what are the money conversations married partners must have before tying the knot? Read on.
Money Is Not Simple Mathematics
A majority of people would like to think of money as just simple mathematics and nothing else. The truth is, it’s much more than that. Money is an emotion, a belief. This belief is mostly developed during childhood, and it’s not easy to change that belief. Money scripts need to be almost identical in you and your spouse.
If you guys have money scripts that are opposite to each other, you will end up arguing with each other. The argument is all because the purpose and value of money are different to you and your partner. Before you eventually walk down the aisle, make sure you take time and have a detailed discussion regarding money matters. You need to understand what money is to both of you.
Assets And Liabilities
You will hardly see anyone discussing student loan debt, credit card statements, and retirement account balances. Getting hitched to each other without having a thorough idea of where you both stand financially will be a disastrous thing to do.
Without being transparent to each other about your financial condition, your marriage won’t probably work the way you want. In case you find out that your new life partner is in debt, it will be nothing less than a shock. You wouldn’t want to make such a discovery on your wedding night, would you?
How Will You Combine Your Finances?
You might not be aware that there is a host of ways through which you can merge your partner’s financial life with yours. It would be better for you guys to discuss how to handle challenges. Your idea about married finances might not match with that of your spouse’s idea. However, you would need to pick up the specifics that would work in your favor irrespective of whether you guys might be on the same page financially.
Your Financial Objectives
You might be well-aware of your financial objectives. For example, your wife wants to be a homemaker and stay at home bringing the kids up, or you want to relax in your retired life on the beach – you guys must have conversations about your goals regularly and how you want to attain them. Every goal has a deadline. However, you won’t be able to plan if you don’t discuss your financial targets.
Who Will Take The Responsibility Of Money Management?
In most couples, one individual takes up the responsibility of money management. However, that is not the case for all. If you can fix within yourself regarding who will be handling everything, it would become a lot easier for both of you to assign the suitable person on the task and give them enough time to take up the chores. This includes everything from shopping and price negotiations to balancing the checkbook and bill payments. Being on the same level in money management can certainly help you avoid committing costly mistakes like not remembering to pay bills and heated arguments.
Financial conversations should not stop after you are married. Remember that money happens to be the biggest stressor in a marriage and can be the reason why couples get into a fight even after a great beginning. Monetary matters are not that complex when you are young. You hardly have any major financial aspects to ponder on. As you start having kids and your family expands, you start feeling the heat. That is why you need to resolve all the aspects before you start your journey together.